What’s Beautiful?  

Belief in oneself and one’s powers or abilities; self-confidence; self-reliance.

This is one of the many definition’s of CONFIDENCE.

Beauty is not defined by a number on a scale or by the dress size we wear.  Beauty is not all about what portray on the outside, but it is also how we feel about ourselves on the inside.  Confidence exudes beauty.  When we are confident in ourselves and our abilities we instantly project beauty.

I am so excited to have been chosen by FitFluential to participate in Under Armour’s What’s Beautiful Campaign because this is my chance to completely recapture my confidence.  To stop wavering between the confident me and the insecure me.  To join a group of confident female athletes in a community that will support each other through this competition and beyond.

The last few years I have found confidence in myself and in places that I least expected it.  I started a blog and was confident enough to put myself out there in the world for everyone to see.  I achieved goals, like my 1:54 half-marathon, that I never thought I could achieve.  I went to FitBloggin’ by myself, without my family and socialized with many people that I have never met before.  Who is this person???  This is the confident me, but I have not always been confident in myself or my abilities and at times, I still struggle.

Confidence in myself has always been a struggle.  I have a hard time believing in my capabilities.  I have always been a straight A student, I even graduated Suma Cum Laude from nursing school, but after every test I knew I failed, even when I consistently scored 90 or above.  I felt like a fraud, that somehow I was just lucky in achieving the grades I achieved, even though I worked hard to achieve those grades.  I tortured the people around my with my unwarranted insecurities.  Crazy, but true.

Returning to school now I still feel the same way.  I just complete my 2nd semester at Empire State college with my second A, yet I still feel inadequate.  I felt somehow I just slid by, that I just happened upon an A, regardless of the work I put into the numerous papers requiring APA format that I have completed.   I know my thoughts are so far from the truth, but I have a hard time pushing them away.  What is wrong with me??????

My lack of confidence is not exclusive to school, but oozes into every aspect of my life.  Work, social activities, running, etc.  I am my own worst enemy.  At times I feel inadequate or like a failure.  Why??  I have no valid reason other than lack of self-confidence.

I waver between the confident Toni and the insecure Toni that does not feel confident.  As I get older and become more comfortable in my own skin, more often than not I AM the confident Toni.  With each successive accomplishment I push the insecure Toni away, but ever once in awhile she still rears her ugly head.

This past weekend when I went to try on my bridesmaid dress for my sister-in-laws wedding my confidence was once again rocked, by s stupid number on a dress.  I knew much of the bridal party were 2’s or 6’s.  I also knew my hips would push me in the 6-8 range and truly  I was okay with those numbers.  I am NOT defined by a number on a dress.  I was prepared to be on the larger side, but when I ended up with a 10, my preparation was useless.  I am NOT a 10, why am I so big, this sux, everyone else is a 2 and I am a 10.  My mind was filled with negativity and my confidence was nil.

I refuse to allow these thoughts to ruin an otherwise beautiful occasion. This is NOT me!!!  I am a beautiful person inside and out, regardless of a number.  The dress looked beautiful, but I had a hard time seeing that due to a number.  How stupid is that??  Who cares about a number????  I will NOT allow a number make me feel bad about myself.

I WILL rebuild and maintain confidence in myself and my abilities.  I have created Team Confidence for every woman who has ever doubted themselves and allowed insecurities to stop them from pursuing their dreams.

This team is about building confidence! We are all capable of anything we set out to do, we just need the confidence to succeed. Confidence = Success! Step out of your comfort zone with confidence and go after a goal you have always wanted to achieve.

#I WILL.

Join Team Confidence today.  Let’s support each other in building our confidence and achieving our goals.

 Under Armour’s What’s Beautiful Campaign is a competition to redefine the female athlete.  Join.  Create an epic goal.  Aim high and challenge yourself, reach for your ultimate goal!  Document your journey.  Complete challenges.  Be the best you can be!!!   After 8 weeks three individual’s will win an Under Armour retreat to Costa Rica.

In addition to joining my team you can follow me and my individual goals.

You can tweet about this competition using the hashtags #whatsbeautiful #iwill #fitfluential

How do you define Beauty??

Disclosure:  This post is sponsored by Under Armour & FitFluential; All opinions and experiences are 100% my own.